Disenchantment

Ah, it’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for: my unenamoration? Debesottedness? Disenrapture? Unsmiting? Wow there are lots of good words to define infatuation….but not too many to express the opposite! Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that my disenchantment with Guatemala has finally come. I think it comes eventually to all travelers who spend enough time in a place and who are not completely clueless. Just as the initial thrill of passion fades from a new romance as one’s paramour’s blemishes or crooked teeth or stomach paunch begin to emerge from the fog of lust, so too does the glossy glow of enchantment dull when the new country disappoints, breaks one heart or cruelly deceives. Sigh, I know that that means I’ll eventually develop a healthier, less idealized relationship with Guatemala but right now I’m feeling more than thoroughly fed up with the place! I also realize that our misadventures make some of the best and most memorable stories and I do acknowledge the value of that as well. But on to the whining! My “issues” with the country are:

1. For the second time during our visit here, I got a really bad intestinal problem just as I was embarking on a long journey. This meant that for 4 days, when I really wanted to be home, no further than 5 feet from the nearest bathroom, tucked into a cozy bed with lots of tea, good books, juice and crackers, I was instead bouncing around on a chicken bus or minivan pumping myself full of Immodium and wondering desperately whether I’d make it to the next bathroom stop. Not to mention the problem of actually having to use said next bathroom stop.

2. On too many occasions to count, the transportation promised during the reservation is not the transportation that shows up. And of course, once the vehicle appears, it’s much too late to do anything. No amount of questioning or probing seems to get around the smiling affirming faces promising whatever it is we seem to want….and eventually not delivering. The latest instance was our overnight bus from Tikal to Guatemala City (8 hour trip). We reserved a “first class” seat on a “premier” bus with the “most popular” bus line that even shows movies. When I probed about the bathrooms (see #1!!!!), I was assured, “Yes, yes, not to worry, everything will be functioning.” And what did we end up on? A rundown old greyhound type bus with worn upholstery, dirty floors, seats that may or may not recline, and a disgusting bathroom. The bathroom was basically a toilet with no water or flush mechanism. We were instructed to only urinate in the toilet and inform the “pilot” if we needed to “do anything else”. Okay, I guess this sort of qualifies as “functioning” as long as one doesn’t ponder the destination of the urine too long. Oh, and no light or TP either (but being a good girl scout, I was prepared with my headlamp and extra roll of TP) The movies were scratchy Spanish B&W films from the 50’s that might have been funny if the volume had been loud enough to hear. Furthermore, although it was direct service, it was not non-stop and we made multiple stop to load additional passengers along the way. What’s worst is that we know a better bus actually does exist! And not just for tourist groups! K&L and I were mistakenly loaded on an earlier bus from the same company that was quite impressive with clean cushy seats that reclined luxuriously, capacious leg room, and even a “hostess”. Unfortunately, we were unloaded at the next stop and told to wait for the next bus while we sadly watched other random Guatemalans board. Now we’re wondering whether we have to order “platinum class deluxe” service or “diamond studded titanium” class or “gold plated ambassador “service to get those cush buses. As it turned out, all of the gringos coming from Tikal to Guatemala City were on the 2^nd bus (complaining). We were pretty sure that was intentional.

3. Kelsey unintentionally made a very generous charitable contribution to some unknown resident of Guatemala. She is definitely a great kid and has a service oriented heart, but when I tell you that she was sobbing after this “donation”, you’ll realize that her laptop was stolen. We left 3 larger pieces of luggage in a locked room at our hotel in Antigua. And yes, we know that leaving a computer is not a good idea, but taking laptop on a 4 day sailing trip and then toting it around Guatemala for a week seemed like an even worse idea. Weighing the risks, we all packed up our laptops and left them in our luggage in Antigua. When we returned this morning, Kelsey’s beautiful new red Dell that she just received for Christmas from her grandparents (with ALL of her photos!) was missing. I spent most of the day hoofing back & forth to the Tourist Police to create an “announcement” and speaking very carefully to make sure I didn’t come out swinging with any inaccurate allegations. I don’t harbor any illusions about any of this really helping to solve the “crime” and I’m afraid we’ll never see the machine again, but I do think the hotel will tighten up their security after being chewed out by the police, and perhaps some other tourist won’t be required to make an involuntary charitable contribution.

So, I’m not feeling too wild about Guatemala at the moment. I realize it’s all part of the travel/learning experience and perhaps four days on a Gatorade diet combined with 36+ hours without sleep may possibly be coloring my perspective just a tad. So, I’ll write about my latest adventures tomorrow after I’ve slept, eaten, and had a chance to sort through all the fun photos we took. We really did have a grand tour, saw many incredible sights, and met a number of lovely people!